As an actor/performer, it’s a simple enough instruction as far as instructions go. When the light comes up, you want to be in it. If you’re not, you want to get in it. Hopefully, before you start doing the thing you’re supposed to be doing.
Find your light and deliver your line.
Find your light and sing the song.
Find your light and dance.
Just find your light. There’s more there than a simple instruction and it’s for more than actors.
All the directing has been done, the cast/band/team/staff has all worked hard, and the talent is ready to bring something great to and for the world. In a way, the light is waiting for you. The opportunity is there and all that is needed is you. The you that is wired for this. The you that has prepared for this. The you that was made for this.
Find your light.
A dear friend of mine, award-winning actress Carol Jaudes, spent her life finding her light all over the U.S., Canada, and the U.K., with leading roles in Hello Dolly!, South Pacific, and Steel Magnolias, just to name a few. She also performed on Broadway in CATS for five years. Along that journey, she was nominated for and won prestigious awards, and every step of the way, she stepped into the light fearless, confident, and ready.
That was just the beginning…
After all the applause died down and all those curtains closed, after the biggest stages in the biggest places in musical theater, she kept finding her light in a bit of a different way. She found it and she shared it with others. She found her light and taught others to find theirs. She stepped offstage and ushered generations of performers on.
In 1999, Carol was hired by The Salvation Army in New York as part of a greater vision to infuse arts like acting, dancing, and more into existing ministries. That vision hoped for towns from Ohio to Maine and Puerto Rico to one day have their own arts programs and activities, especially for young people. That vision sought to use those arts to share the hope of the gospel and the grace of God with others. And Carol was ready for it. She started an acting group made of Salvation Army employees and they hit the road with scripts and sketches that embraced the vision. They were a hit. Invitations flowed in. Camps, youth events, retreats, you name it and the Territorial Arts Ministries (TAM) team was there. They found their light.
Enter Stage West
About a year later, they flew west to demonstrate their mission and method on the West Coast. On that trip, Carol found me in Pasadena, California. She was good at finding people. She spent a lot of years doing it.
It was a toasty June Saturday at a large regional Salvation Army event and out of the blue, I was invited up on stage with her team to perform a part-scripted, part-improvised sketch about the parable of the lost (prodigal) son. (See Luke 15:11-32)
I had no idea what was coming, my job was simply to “do what I was told.” This included lines fed to me, ridiculous actions and blocking (a not-so-fancy word for moving from A to B on a stage or stage-like area), and participating willingly and without question in the story as it was shared with me and the audience at the same time. We had an absolute blast. It was the very first time that I found my light with Carol. It was the beginning of something that would change my life.
The following Friday evening, they had nearly wrapped up their West Coast trip and were back again in the Pasadena area and were participating in our church’s Friday night service. Like the week before, the team took their positions and performed. They shared their talents and efforts to tell beautiful stories in beautiful ways and I was hooked. As we often did after our Friday night services, a group went out to eat once everything was put away and locked up. The TAM team came along and there was food and laughter and some great memories made. As we walked out of the restaurant, Carol Jaudes pulled me aside and told me about the very first Territorial Arts Ministries Conservatory that was taking place just a few months later at a Salvation Army camp in New Jersey. It was meant for young people who 1) felt that the arts were part of who they were, and 2) might feel left out of other, more prominent ministry opportunities. And then she invited me to come as a student instructor. The light was waiting for me to participate in the student acting track but also teach improv with some guy named Ian Evans.
Yes, and…
A year later, after being invited back as a full instructor to TAM Conservatory Chapter Two, I brought resumes. A month after that, I was offered a job in Spring Valley, New York. A month after that, I moved across the country because people were in love with forms of storytelling that were changing lives. They were finding their light, and I was, too.
It was Carol who invited me East. It was Carol who introduced me to the woman who would become my wife. For over ten years, I was part of the team. When it came to TAM Conservatory Chapter Seventeen, there were only three of us who had been there since the very beginning: Carol, some guy named Ian Evans, and me. Honorable mention goes to my other dear friend Karen Krinjak because she would have been there every single year but had to miss one. We had been all over together. We had grown together. We had done so much more than perform and our favorite thing along the journey was the idea that drove Carol every day. Glorify God and share who we are and what we have. Find your light.
I guess that’s the thing about the light, isn’t it? It’s not yours. I mean, you don’t control it. You work hard, you let yourself be taught and directed, you trust the process and give everything you can to it, but in the end, the light doesn’t belong to you. You can do a lot outside the light, and it could be great, but that’s not what it’s meant for, is it?
Every sketch was a learning experience. Every trip was about telling a story that could transform lives. And every moment was about showing people that God could do anything in their lives and with their lives. We never said it, but all along our goal was to help them find their light.
That team traveled for years once I could no longer be a part of it and TAM Conservatory is well into its third decade and still bringing young people from all over to learn from professional actors, dancers, and technical wizards. And through it all, I’ve had the pleasure of calling Ian Evans a friend for more than two decades. We’ve had tacos together.
The Fourth Wall
Carol also spent years at her local Salvation Army church, offering her gifts to teach and develop others in not just their acting, singing, and dancing abilities, but from a place that held that One Story sacred. She literally wrote books about transforming our experiences with the scriptures into deep, meaningful experiences on Sunday mornings. She led young performers and when she couldn’t do all the leading, she taught others to lead.
She touched two lives in particular that are very special to me. One of those is my son, Andrew, whose passion for theater started in that church with Carol. Andrew was just appointed as Technical Director and Assistant Manager for his high school’s stage crew. This past fall, his high school acting debut was as Professor Plum in their production of Clue. The other one is my daughter Emma, who participated in those church drama groups, as well. Carol’s energy and leadership made such an impact that Emma still wants to be like Carol. They found their light.
We are talking about generations. I met her in 2001 and she was already helping people find their light. It’s 2023 and this morning, we saw this year’s Christmas pageant at that church and kids of every age finding their light. Every kid that’s ever been reached by Carol’s passion and every soul that has or will ever find their light because of her impact is a life changed for good. Each one doesn’t just find their light but becomes one for others.
The Final Curtain Call
This week, Carol left us. While we are mourning, we can’t help but see and know that she made the world a far better place for so many people.
Thank you, Carol Jaudes, for everything. Mostly, though, thank you for finding your light that one time so long ago and never, ever losing your love for it.
Rest in peace, Carol. Rest in your light. God is glorified.
2 Comments
Thank you Chris, powerfully moving, ringing with truth , shining with light, love, and thanksgiving.. Just like Jesus, and Carol, and many others whom i know and respect, including you. A moving tribute to Carol, to Jesus in Carol and probably that’s why it resonates with others who have Jesus, ( The LIght). Living in them. Love you, man, (and Ian too).
Beautifully said, thank you for sharing. Thank you for reflecting. She shined so brightly, and I see her reflection in generations.